First Steps.....about killed me.

First things first. I did it! I finally got my porky derriere moving. I have to say, Jessie had my heart rate up before I ever got him going, but what can I say? He's an attractive guy. I only spent about five minutes because I'm afraid that's all my poor heart could take. I didn't want to wear him out on our first date; I'm much better in small doses.

All kidding aside, I made it through 5 minutes, but about 2 minutes into it, my back was screaming. My abdominal and back muscles are seriously weak, but walking in slow spurts will be a good way to strengthen them again; at least until I can get back in a pool. I really felt it in my knees and left hip too. My poor body.

According to the little monitor on my treadmill, the highest my heart rate got was 123, but that was on the lowest setting. When I got on the treadmill, it was already up to 118 and 123 seems to be the limit for fatburning. Anything higher than that and I slip into anaerobic exercise. I'm hoping that if I continue to do it regularly, I will gradually be able to increase the amount of time I'm walking. My focus right now is on increasing the amount of time I spend on the treadmill and not so much how fast I'm walking. As long as I have my heart rate in the fat burning zone, I will assume I'm doing some good.

It is so disappointing to see how difficult things are for me. Finishing five minutes was harder than finishing 45 minutes used to be. Then, it was more because I was lazy and just had other things I'd rather be doing. Now, it is truly physically difficult for me to go much beyond one minute. I can continue though.

I start my weight training today. I posted before that I am going to be following the exercises here for a seated total body workout which is perfect for the obese or other people who might have physical limitations, but still want to strength train. I will be alternating upper body workouts with lower body workouts each day and taking Sunday as my rest day. Today I'll start with my upper body. I'm almost looking forward to feeling sore; knowing that my muscles are changing, even if its only bit by bit.

As far as the weigh in, I maintained this week (please see my weight and measurement charts to the left). I suppose I should be glad I'm not gaining, but I won't lie, it is rather disappointing. In the past, I've just seen it come off faster in the beginning, but I know that getting my activity level up will help get things moving again. I also reminded myself that when I started this journey earlier in January I weighed 465 lbs not 460 so all in all, I've lost at least 16 lbs. Right now, I just want to make it into the 430's. Hopefully by the end of march or at least the first couple of weeks of April for sure. We'll see....

Now, let's talk about those measurements... SO hard to post those for you guys. The shame in realizing that my thigh is as big as an average man's waist; my waist is 5'9" around. I truly am wider than I am tall..unreal. I compared those measurements with where I was the last time I dieted and worked out and every single number was up by 1 or 2 inches. I'm not surprised by that though. I can feel it in my clothes and in how uncomfortable I am in my own skin. I have to start somewhere though and I'm already feeling better with what I've lost thus far. It's only going to get better right?

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Buffed, Beautiful and Bitchin'!

Sorry, I couldn’t NOT give a little shout out to Vera when we're talking about exercise. Of course it is just for your amusement. I'm quite fond of my bazooms so I won't be purchasing this particular workout to follow.

However, now that I have 10 whole lbs off, I figured it is time for me to start thinking about getting physical (cue Olivia Newton-John…just another little earworm for my faithful readers). At this weight, I am somewhat limited about what I can do. I’m limited for a couple of reasons. The obvious reason is my size; and honestly, let's just face it...at this size ALL my reasons are fairly obvious. My poor body is just having a very difficult time hauling itself around lately and for good reason. As I’ve mentioned before, I not only have gained weight in the last year, but I lost a lot of muscle mass as my daily activity decreased to almost nothing. I work from home, I have someone who can run errands for me, shop for me, etc so even the normal every day activity I used to get disappeared.

Initially, the help with errands and shopping was done more because I was the breadwinner and literally was working about 80 hours a week while I put my husband through school. He took over a lot of the other household duties while I scheduled practically every waking moment with some kind of work. In my mind, it would be worth it once he got his degree. Then, all hell broke loose with my son and the school placement we had him. It was particularly traumatic for our family and came at a very fragile point in our marriage. Once the dust cleared, our marriage was toast and we were struggling to get T on even footing again (which took lots of hospital stays and more). As I said, when T and I finally moved out, I went into a deep depression and everything just snowballed for my physically.

I’ve always enjoyed exercising…once I can get going and get a routine in place. For me, it’s taking that first step that always seems to be so hard, and lately I have more than enough excuses at the ready. I’m currently on medication for problems with my heart, blood pressure, thyroid, diabetes, and depression. I also have a history of chronic migraines; like 3-4 a week although they’ve gotten much better since I started the on blood pressure medication which makes me think my headaches weren’t migraines at all. When I try to exercise, I always have to worry about keeping my heart rate in a certain zone or it will trigger migraines…I know other people suffer from exercise-induced headaches as well and I’ve had them all my life, no matter what size I was. Even when I was in the best shape of my life I would get migraines if I exercised too intensely or got my body temperature up too high.

So…finding some exercise that I can do can be a bit of a challenge, especially lately. I know that I could do pool walking. That is great for getting my muscles back in shape, it keeps me cool. Apart from the embarrassment of getting into a swimsuit (which I really don’t care about at this point lol) its perfect for me. The weather, however, makes it a bit of a challenge to find a pool to use. I can join the gym over at my bariatric center, but it would take $300 that I don’t have at the moment. The only YMCA with an indoor pool is in a bad part of town and I decided it was going to be practically impossible to get there in the rush hour traffic. So, at least for now working out in the pool is on hold.

I have a sturdy treadmill at home I could use. I bought it at least 3 years ago and of course it’s hardly been used. It supposedly will accommodate my weight, but lately, my heart rate goes up almost immediately and then surpasses the “safe” zone in the first 5 minutes. I decided the other day that what I should probably do is start some strength training exercises and work on getting 20 minutes of cardio in a day even if it’s just jumping on the treadmill for 5 minutes at a time. I have to start somewhere right?

I’ve been trying to find some ideas for strength training exercises that I can do that don’t require me getting on the ground because once I’m down, it’s going to take a village to get me back up. I found some seated exercises here and even though I’m sure I’m going to feel like a complete loser doing them, I’m going to give them a shot.

Now I just need to get my fat butt UP to do it. How do you get yourself motivated to exercise? Better yet, how do you motivate your teenagers to exercise…he’s my next challenge!