Checking in

Well, we celebrated my birthday this weekend. Erik was a true sweetheart, he cleaned the house (that had gone to hell while I was sick), brought me a dinner from my favorite restaurant (no it wasn't low cal, but since I was coming off my stomach trouble, I ate MUCH less than I normally would have and even threw away the rest) on friday night.

Last night, we had a friend and her daughter come over for spaghetti dinner and Erik had hors d'oeuvres, salad and Shannon brought a delicious red wine. I normally can't drink red wine because it causes migraines and aggravates my rosacea, but I allowed myself half a glass because it was so delicious! No migraine and no major rosacea problems. I kept my portions of everything small and had a piece of the cookie cake Erik bought and that was it. Let me tell you...after many days of fruit, soups, ginger ale and perrier....I can't tell you how horrible I felt after eating all this rich food :P I can really feel it today. I think I really needed that because I was finally feeling better, got my energy back, was feeling like a real person again, but after splurging...even modestly on such sweet and rich foods, I felt like absolute crap today. Stomach bothering me again, my energy level WAY down, etc. Point taken.

Erik "bought" me some books (this one, http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0307454541/ref=oss_product, and this one) and a new kettle so that I can make all my fancy teas in. I say "bought" because I actually ordered them and said "I ordered what I wanted for my birthday, why don't you and tanner wrap them up and give them to me as presents from the two of you lol?" As busy as he's been, I knew he wasn't going to be able to get out to get me anything. He still came through with the great dinner (both nights) AND even got me a beautiful bouquet of roses (all different colors)...there were even a few salmon colored roses that made me think of mom which was nice.

The last time I checked I was around 437/438. I'll weigh again tomorrow and hope that the eating I've done hasn't undone too much. If it has, I'll just get busy losing it again. I've been doing random things lately to try to strengthen my legs. I've tried to work in two to three rounds of squats (10 each) a day. Last night before bed, I actually did 20!! I've also been doing tip toe raises to work on my calves and this morning when I got out of bed, I was actually sore and I was EXCITED to be sore :)

I don't know...after the last month or so of feeling like I was on the slippery slope towards permanent immobility, I really just realized that I am the ONLY thing standing in my way. Unfortunately someone isn't going to conk me over the head and give me the liposuction of a lifetime so I need to just suck up all my excuses and get it done. I need to focus on what I CAN do right now and enjoy the small victories and sooner or later, I'll be seeing some bigger results.

Believe it or not, I have all this optimism AND I had to resort to taking ambien the last three days (some tylenol shortage or something). those of you who have followed me for a while know that ambien seemed to cause severe depression, but so far so good. If I start whining again and talking all maudlin, remind me to get off the ambien lol.

Oh! Back is feeling better, still doing the exercises, still taking all the meds too, but its doing better. Cyst seems to be healing so fingers crossed, it doesn't come back.

I can't remember if I mentioned it or not, but I'm trying to come up with 5 things I can change right now. I've thought of the following so far:

1. No more soda (diet or otherwise...while I was sick, I drank ginger ale and a bit of coke, but I'm off them again). Perrier seems to give me the fix I need without all the sugar and caffeine so yay perrier!

2. Continue doing back exercises at least once a day. I've added in a few more squats and calf raises just to help strengthen my legs.

3. Get my 5 servings of fruits and veggies in each day.

4. Drink 64 oz. of water a day.

5. Do SOMETHING with Tanner each day to incorporate more activity in our lives. Even if it is a one minute walk on the treadmill or crunches in bed (I can't get on the floor right now....getting down is the easy part, getting back up is another matter), 5 minutes of an exercise video, etc. But it has to be with tanner!

So there is my list for this week. I think I'm going to sit down with Tanner too and see if he can come up with 5 things to change this week. Maybe If I get him focused more on change and not so much on what he can't eat or do, etc it won't seem so bad. I'll let you know how that goes.

Hope you have a wonderful sunday!