Seein' Doctors and Losing Weight

Note: I was going to try to find a funny little cartoon about going to the gynecologist and made the mistake of image googling "gynecologist" without the porn filter on :P Now I'm a little sick to my stomach. Hope you don't mind the blog sans funny cartoon!

Ok so last week, I spent a lot of time in doctor’s offices. I scheduled an appointment with my gyno’s nurse practitioner and learned that she was also a fellow bariatric patient. She had the RNY, but was interested to hear about the sleeve. I wasn’t sure if she was going to be able to do a pap that day although the medication she prescribed had pretty much stopped the bleeding I was experiencing. I think after talking to me a bit and noticing that it had been five years since my last pap, she figured she better strike while the iron was hot so she sent me off with my superman cape and told me to get nekkid.

I love the things they talk to you about while they are inserting the speculum and basically probing around in your privates: “So what do you do for a living?” “Are you from San Antonio?” “Do you live nearby?” All of these questions you are obligated to answer as if you were merely standing in line at the grocery counter and not spread eagled with lots of equipment and appendages in your hoo-ha. I did my best to answer her questions and when she complimented me on my “nice long cervix” I thanked her and told her that I got compliments on it all the time (I didn’t really, it was one of those things I thought of later and wished I had said). I mean seriously? Later when I told Erik what she had said I made some stupid joke about it being something he could brag to his friends about: “Yeah my wife may weigh a few hundred pounds, but MAN if you could see her cervix you’d understand!”

She seemed to think everything was ok, but wanted me to go for an ultrasound and since I’m 40, she wanted me to get in for a mammogram (BTW blogging buddies, Breast Cancer Awareness Month is coming up in October so go get yourself squished!).

I’ve had the ultrasound (which was SO uncomfortable….they always are…I’ll spare you the details for once) and heard back from my gyno. Apparently my uterine lining (which can build up in people with PCOS and put them at risk for endometrial cancer) was pretty thin so she isn’t sure whether they will need to put in an IUD (the NP had suggested it as a way to keep the lining from building up and I was all for it because it meant NO PERIOD YAY). My doctor was concerned that if we did an IUD it might actually cause break through bleeding since the lining was so thin to begin with. Anyway, we are going to wait and see how the next cycle goes before taking any action.

I have my mammogram this Saturday so fingers crossed there. I’ve had mammograms before so I know what to expect…a perky little cheerleader who is going to have to act as if my mammoth breastages are just as lovely as hers! Oh well, they will be SOME DAY! By the end of this week, I should be fairly thoroughly checked out.

I almost forgot, remember the cyst from hell? Yeah it is still giving me problems so I went in to see a dermatologist this time around. She lanced it and injected some steroids so hopefully it will go away already!

Hmm, what other repulsive medical information can I share with the masses and ensure my single status for the rest of my life? I think that’s about it guys sorry…my well of disgusting factual tidbits has run dry.

On the weight loss front, I am down to 366!! Today I was actually 367, but I think that is because I came back off my blood pressure meds. OH! I forgot to tell you…when I went to the gyno, my blood pressure was up a bit 130/100 :S She advised that I go back on my BP meds which I did for several days, but I felt pretty crappy the days I took it. Very similar to when I had to be hospitalized, but not nearly as bad. I just had NO energy, really tired almost to the point that talking at the end of the day would wear me out. Lately, I’m used to feeling super energized so I stopped them yesterday and I’m going to try to find some time to get into my regular doc to have my BP taken to see if maybe that one time was just a flukey thing.

Because of the lack of energy, I haven’t been getting on the treadmill the last few days, but I HAVE been doing a whole lot more around the house. My mom would die to know how much I am enjoying housework now that I can actually do it again. I think Erik is enjoying it too lol. I’ve also been trying out a lot of new recipes. We had a low carb version of salmon patties last night (I used almond flour instead of breadcrumbs and flour) and they turned out alright. I think I’m going to have to add something (lemon pepper and maybe squeeze a little lemon juice on them afterwards). They were just ok. I also tried this baked cauliflower which turned out fairly horrible. I don’t recommend it :P

As far as weight loss goes, I have posted a projected weight I want to be at for each month and I’m darn close to where I want to be by next Thursday which will be my 3-month mark since surgery. The goal weight is 359. I might be able to do that, but I’m going to have to step up the exercise for sure. Even if I don’t make it, just being this close is pretty awesome. I have figured that if I continue to lose the way I have been, I could be under 300 by the end of the year. We’ll have to wait and see though.