My Progress!

Monday, November 8, 2010

My current top 10 things I love about my life post-surgery

1. Being able to stand for as long as I want to without my calves screaming in agony.
2. Walking without the limping gait I sported 5 months ago because my knees hurt.
3. Going out in public and "blending" in. I'm still a big girl, but like Chris noted in one of her comments, I'm more like all the other fat people in the world. Instead of being freak show fat, I'm more your average fat American....trust me, after experiencing freak show fat, you can be grateful to be just a fat American :)
4. I love that when I go to get a pedicure now, it is actually relaxing! Before, just getting a pedicure was like a pilates workout for me as I often had to hold my legs in awkward positions for periods of time while they filed and buffed, etc!
5. I love doing my hair and makeup now because when I'm done, I actually SEE the pretty me emerging. Before, I'd go to the trouble to make myself up and look in the mirror and see what a waste of time it was. Typically, the effort of getting ready would have me sweating so my hair and makeup would be flat by the time I got done.
6. I love that every time I take time to make myself up, put on something other than a ratty t-shirt and workout capris Tanner asks me where we are going. "Nowhere, I just wanted to look pretty :)" He usually gives me funny looks like I've lost my mind, but that's ok.
7. I really love the moments when Tanner comments on my weight loss. The time we went walking and he was behind me and just popped out with "Wow mom! You are doing great! We've walked a long way" Another time, I came out wearing a new outfit and he said "Wow mom! You are getting skinny!" It just dawned on me that he probably doesn't remember me at this weight. The last time I weighed under 350 lbs he was probably 5, if that old.
8. I LOVE that my progress seems to be motivating Tanner as well. I see him thinking more about his food choices and tracking his weight and I'm proud to finally be having a positive impact on his relationship with food and developing a more active lifestyle.
9. I love the fact that I mostly eat to fuel my body now. I still have the occasional craving, but I can often satisfy it with a tiny taste of whatever it is I'm craving. With all the halloween candy that was in our house, I allowed myself the tiniest bite of a snickers bar Tanner had (I'm talking miniscule bite). It was the first "cheat" I've had since surgery. Not only was I completely satisfied afterwards, but after the bite my reaction was kind of "meh, that was unnecessary." The old me couldn't have stopped at one candy bar much less one bite! It's awesome to not be ruled by my appetite/cravings anymore.
10. I will NEVER get tired of the sense of hope and excitement for my future that I have now. When you have lived several years basically resigned to the fact that you probably will never get the weight off and you really are DONE living at the ripe old age of 38, 39, 40...to have that hope back is indescribable.

4 Comments:

The Fat Mom said...

I love this!

Jess said...

I truly enjoyed reading this! It gave me a sense of hope. (Even though I already have hope...more never hurts!). Thanks! :)

gracies tough journey said...

"I will NEVER get tired of the sense of hope and excitement for my future that I have now" I hear you that is wonderful feeling. Good luck to you and you are doing wonderful. Gracie

cmoursler said...

lol! I dress up all the time for no reason now too..and my kids are ALWAYS asking "where are we going."
It feels great, doesn't it.
Man, it's fun watching you on this ride.
I am so happy for you.