Yes, still smiling :) I apologize, but this first week of school has taken a lot of my concentration, energy and brain power. Chemistry is going to be a challenge for me. I’ve pretty much cracked the books open as soon as I finish work, but in addition to my day job, Im still working between 15-30 hours a week at my other job. Something is going to have to give, because I haven’t even started looking at my sociology work :S
I’m still hovering between 315 and 317, but this week I’m starting P90. Erik and I just watched the first workout and while I think it is definitely going to be a challenge, I think that I can adapt the moves and get a decent workout. When I was doing my boot camp workouts at the gym, I did the most ridiculous adaptations compared to what everyone else in the class was doing, but I left there feeling just as wiped as the rest of them and I was definitely stronger by the end of the three months. I’m probably going to have Erik take some pictures of me, but honestly guys…I don’t know if I’m going to be brave enough to post them here just yet. I’m talking biggest loser style jog bra and biking shorts pics that won’t hide a thing and yeah…I just don’t know that I’m quite that brave.
I’m looking forward to getting started on the workout though. It seems like every time I’ve tried to get going, I’d wind up with an injury or back in the hospital so I’m going to work out as hard as I can, but I’m definitely going to be smart about it so that I can continue. I will do my best to report in as often as I can as well.
This week, I’m going to make a few changes to my diet as well. I’m going to add in a protein shake because if I’m going to be doing more activity, I’m going to need the protein to help build the muscle. I haven’t decided whether the shake will replace a meal or in addition to the meals I eat. I may just see how I feel. To begin with, I think it may be in addition to what I’ve been eating.
I’m also going to cut out the nightly glass of wine I started having. I’ve never been much of a drinker, but in the last few weeks, I got into the habit of having one glass of wine as I was finishing up my work on the night shift. I know one glass of wine isn’t horrible, but I just don’t like having anything in my life at this time that is habitual. I’m also somewhat worried about transference or whatever they call it when a former food addict has surgery and winds up replacing food with alcohol or sex or shopping…whatever fills that void. Apart from worrying about the psychological implications of a new behavior, I am beginning to wonder if that one glass of wine is causing my weight loss to slow down. I guess we will see what happens when I stop it.
On the social scene, I’m continuing to get out and about whenever I can. I went to a wine social Friday with one of the meetup groups I joined and it was fun. There really is such an amazing group of people that go to these things. I found myself at one point in a conversation with an FBI agent and a former race car driver; really fascinating and interesting people. Despite this, I found myself mid-evening questioning whether I was really enjoying myself. I enjoyed getting dressed up and out of the house for sure, but I think I’d enjoy more outings like the dinners, etc where you can interact more. This honestly felt more like going to a club. The music was loud, people were standing everywhere, you really couldn’t carry on a conversation, etc. I mean, what is the point of having all these interesting people to talk to if you can’t hear each other over the music right? I was never really much into clubbing as a younger adult (I was typically the den mother/designated driver) and I guess not much has changed in the last 20 years. I am, however dying to go to this lecture tomorrow, but I just don’t know if I’m going to make it. Erik has to work and I think Tanner would be bored stiff. Well part of me thinks he might actually enjoy some of it, but I’m guessing it is going to be super “talky” and he’d probably get lost trying to follow along. I checked into getting an interpreter which they were more than happy to provide, but I wound up nixing the idea because I thought I could just leave Tanner at home while I went so I don't want to call them back at the last minute to change my mind. Guess I'll wait and see tomorrow, I probably need to study anyway.
I’ve also been enjoying new friendships I’ve formed and getting out with one person in particular. I’ve decided that I’m going to remain somewhat quiet about this aspect of my life since my whole situation is somewhat complicated. Out of respect for my son, I won’t be discussing much more on the subject of dating, etc. Just know that I am definitely not actively pursuing new prospects at the moment, but I have developed a friendship with someone and am interested in seeing where it might go. Erik is fully informed and while somewhat protective of me, is supportive.
So! There you have it…my week in a nutshell. I plan on elaborating on my last lab experience later in the week. It went well, but I swear, I almost died lol. All I have to say is the prof is getting a strongly worded email suggesting that we take the thermostat down a notch for our next lab.
As a closer, I’m interested in learning if any of you guys have done the P90 program. This isn’t the P90X people, just the P90…baby steps, baby steps.