SSDD

You will soon see why I was too lazy to find a pic for today's blog. So I decided to introduce you to Matthew. Teresa joined me for a few cocktails in my happy place yesterday and insisted on TWO cabana boys. As long as she didn't have designs on mine, I said "have at it." Matthew is one of hers and, let me tell ya...he's a very nice addition to my happy place. If you ever want to join Teresa and I, grab a foo foo drink, a tiny string bikini and sexy cabana boy and join us!

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OMG, trust me...you do NOT want to know how this day went. I, once again, had started a post that was going to share some pics of my new hair, and then the Universe had to drop its pants and take a nice shiny dump on my day. The Universe seriously does NOT want me to show you how beautiful I am because every time I work up a post to share these pics with you, The Universe finds some new and interesting way to seriously make me regret being born. At that point, my hairdo just seems a bit...I don't know...beside the point? Don't worry, its nothing that a handful of xanax can't remedy.

I know I've sounded like a drug addict lush the last few posts...I promise you, I am not really a pill popper and "drinking" for me is like one beer. Trust me, I would LOVE to have another vice that didn't make my ass the size of manhattan, but no....My drug of choice is food, delicious food. Despite having another crapalicious day,I haven't had a drink tonight and BELIEVE ME...I need a damn drink ...or an entire cherry pie...either one would probably suffice.

Instead, I headed straight to bed after I got off work. We were supposed to go to a friends tonight for poker and good time, but about midway through my shift I had a conversation with my supervisor and while MOST of it went GREAT...at the very end, he had to dress me down AGAIN for missing a break.
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I get off the phone with my supervisor just as Erik walks in the door to fax the paperwork to the lawyers. It is then that I realize I am going to have to disconnect my work phone to do it and since I'm working, I can't do that, but seeing as we have a meeting at 4PM we HAVE to get this info to them ASAP. Frustrated and seriously on the verge of grabbing a twinkie or a pistol to put in my mouth (I hadn't decided which), I tell him to go somewhere and fax it. F it, just get it done (and no, the "F" is not an abbreviation for "fax.")

Erik leaves, comes back and tells me that the fax wouldn't go through, but as he walks in, he finds me in tears and researching shore trips for someone's amazing 33 day Mexican cruise. Concerned, he sits down and lets me vent and yell and scream about all the pressure I'm under and how even going to do something fun tonight with friends is just more pressure to be somewhere and do something in the limited time I have. Poor Tanner must have heard me venting and comes in and all of a sudden becomes a "mini-me."

Tanner: Mom, whats wrong?

Erik: Nothing sweetie, mommy is just having a bad day and she's stressed out, its ok

Tanner: Mom, don't get so mad. Calm down, have you tried your breathing

(gee, this is deja vu, all of this sounds strangely familiar)

Me: Yes sweetie, I'm sorry, I'm not mad at daddy, Im just venting.

Tanner: Ok, well just calm down, you don't want to get mad and make a bad choice.

(oh, I see what is happening here. Apparently he has been listening everytime we try to talk him through a meltdown)

Erik: Mommy isn't mad really, it just helps to talk it out. I know for you, that isn't helpful, but for mommy it is.

Tanner: Ok, well try to not think about it right now ok mom?

Me: Ok Tanner, thanks sweetie.

How is it that children know the absolute PERFECT moment to parrot all your parenting back at you and why does it make you feel like such an idiot? Ahhhh, this kid God love him.

Hopefully you have made it this far, because here's a little good news for the day. I didn't use all this crap as an excuse to go off my diet. Today's weight loss is updated so take a look. It was the one thing that put a smile on my face today; that has to count for something!!.

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